Meet my blog BFF, Mallory!

I am so happy to bring you what you're about to read. The fact that I meet new friends through blogging is wonderful, but meeting Mallory has been the extra icing on the cake. She's funny, easy going, totally random and she laughs at all my jokes too. Sistas from another Mistas, I like to say. We both adore our hubs, we love wine and we're quirky in ways only other quirkies can appreciate....with that in mind....Here's Mallory to tell you just how truly quirky and awkward she really is! 

If Only You Knew How Truly Awkward I Am:

Consider this the spin on If You Really Knew Me. 
Heaven forbid I just stick with an oldie but a goodie.


I turn every food/drink label facing outwards. Even on boxes in the cupboard.
I will NOT look at the nutritional facts.

I grew up in a one story house, with friends who had one story houses.
I'm ridiculously bad at climbing stairs. I fall up them frequently.
I sometimes fall down them too.

I sort the silverware before I put it in the dishwasher.

I organized my junk drawer before it even knew it was a junk drawer.

I never snort laugh it front of people, but often snort laugh when alone.

When I was about 5, I forgot that donkeys were called donkeys and called them nee-haws. My parents still won't let me forget it.

I also called Barnes & Noble, Bones & Nobbles.
It made perfect sense at the time.

I've had bouts with insomnia since I was 7, but when I was 7 my mom was sick of my no sleep nonsense and told me to read the dictionary to fall asleep. I didn't fall asleep but I had a heck of a good vocabulary when I was 8.

I hate odd numbers.
They just feel wrong.

I eat frosting from the can. 
With a spoon of course. I'm not an animal.

I buy baking chocolate chips, not to bake with but to eat at night.
I feel so much better about the quantities of chocolate I eat when I don't have wrappers staring at me.
The same applies to the large bottles of wine I consume.

All food related comments are irrelevant.
I could stand to eat a sandwich.
I am 5'5" and I weigh 107 pounds.
This makes my BMI 17.8, which is underweight for an adult.
I'm not really an adult so this too is irrelevant.
I'm like Tinker Bell.
Or was that just Peter Pan that never grew up?

My nickname in 3rd grade was Shrimp.

I have bigger hands than my husband.
They are 7 inches long from base to end of my middle finger.
Yes. That is a large hand.
Maybe it's because it's me looking at this photo, but this is a great way to show how large my hands look at the ends of my arms.

No, I don't have jumbo feet. I wear a size 7, if anyone wants to send me free shoes.

If I'm driving and I'm told to turn, I will turn the opposite direction 90% of the time. 
This isn't on purpose. I'm not quite sure why I do it.

I won't eat leftovers. 
I feel like they are uncooked.

Now that ya'll know how weird I am, come visit me at From California to Kansas

I know. I totally sold you on me and my blog.
It's a gift.