Today, I am celebrating the 3rd birthday of my little mini me,
She came in to this world as calmly as she has never been since.
The time between her delivery and her first cry were the longest split seconds of my life.
She looked just like her brother and the smile on my face when she was finally in my arms would stay there for the rest of my days. Sleeping with her newborn hands wrapped tight around my pinkie and her fuzzy hair tickling my nose where among the calmest, most content hours of my entire being.
There was satisfaction in knowing that my future best friend, co adventurer and fellow hair do lover was finally here by my side. There was satisfaction that I had never known before her arrival because a space in my heart that I never knew existed suddenly overflowed with happiness, awe and pleasure knowing that I had been chosen to be this precious baby girl's mother.
I remember whispering to her that I would spend the rest of my life being her biggest fan and loudest cheerleader. I would lay next to her and watch her sleep, matching her breath for breath and inhaling that sweet newborn baby scent that reminds me of clouds and a hug.
As the first months of Reese the infant passed by in fast forward, I relished in her love of discovering new things and adored her haphazard hair that never would lay down flat. She had a way of looking up at me while I talked as if she could understand every word a
and her eyes always sparkled with the promise that said she believed every word.
Before I knew what happened, Reese the Personality started to make me laugh every day. Sometimes I was laughing at her silly words and her tiny lisp and other days I was laughing at myself in anticipation of the strong willed and ornery child I needed to prepare for. Her preferences for the color purple, for drawing and singing blossomed in to full blown obsessions which at first, I found endearing and then faded a little in wonder as the stress of not having that certain blanket or that certain perfected hairstyle available made me anticipate her pouty face and incessant questions.
And now, 3 years after the day I met her, Reese Josephine is still a wonder to me. Her uncanny memory, her sympathetic heart and her sassy attitude are exactly qualities I would given her if I could have written her character inside the pages of a novel. I love the way she closes her eyes and looks towards the sky when she's singing a high note. I love the way she twirls around in circles so fast she falls to the ground. I love the way she whimpers when she's pretending to be a baby and I love the way she pretends to be out of breath when she runs. I love the way the faces on everyone around her light up as they stare at the beautiful girl with the funny little voice. I love the way my heart swells when she walks in to room full of our family who loves her. I loved holding her up in the middle of her birthday party so she could welcome everyone at the top of her lungs. And most of all, I love being the person that is half of her. I can't wait until she's old enough to understand what I mean when I tell her that all of my best parts are wrapped up in her. Anything good about me I hope and pray settles and multiplies inside her soul.
If you understood what this all meant right now, Reese, I would tell you. But here it will be, written out for all to see, until you can read for yourself how much I love you.
But until then I will show you: I promise to set up the rooms in your doll house just so, I promise to never let your Barbie's hair get tangled, I promise to always have a hug ready and not only that, I promise to recognize how badly you need one before you even know it yourself.
I promise to keep whatever you are currently obsessing over close at hand. Your "bebe" blanket will be there at bedtime, your ballerina slippers will be ready to go outside with you and your hair ties will be close by in anticipation of your braids.
I promise to nurture and support whatever talents, passions and platforms that make your heart swell.
I promise to always be a mom you'll be proud of.