Want to know what I've learned this week?
This week, I've learned that you can be jealous of people and still be happy for them.
I mean, can you really be mad at the 2 women in that photo, who are obviously the 2 happiest, most excited women in the world?
That's my mom and sister, in sheer bliss, at a live taping of the Ellen show yesterday. They're also going to the Critic's Choice Awards in elegant black dresses and professional makeup. They went to the award's pre-party last night too.
Again, like I said, I am happy for them. No sour grapes here, no sirree.
Okay, cut the crap. I am totally jealous. Like, lip sneering jealous. But at the same, I couldn't be more excited for them. Next year, I'll get to go with my mom on her annual trip to the Critic's Choice Awards, thanks to her awesome movie review gig so I can't say anything too mean about how jealous I am or she might skip me over and take my little sister instead.
Did I also mentioned that Mariah Carrey dropped in a gave the entire audience tickets to her Vegas show and stays at Caesar's Palace? And they got to go backstage? And then they got surprised again because they got to stick around for another taping and out walked Jennifer Lopez?
Nope, not jealous at all.
Moving on so I don't blow my own cover, I also learned this week what it takes to get over a little case of the sads.
Before I get too far, I'll elaborate on the sads. The sads are kind of like those feelings you get once a month, but these don't shake off quite as easy. You know when you have a bad dream and whatever happened in that dream was so real and unnerving that the feeling it gave you sticks around all day?
I think that's what was going on this week. I had a dream about a baby. A little beautiful round baby that I knew in the dream was mine and CJ's. I was so happy in the dream and then remembered when I woke up, as I do every morning, that I can't have any more babies. My babies are 7 and 4 now...so why does dreaming of a baby make me feel so sad that I won't ever have one again in real life? Do I just want another one because of the happy feeling I had so vividly in my dream? Is having another baby when CJ and I have 5 together really even that sensible? This week I learned that I really do truly wish I could have another baby. A revelation that makes me have this major case of sadness I can't quite put my head around...
What does it take to get over those sads? I haven't figured it out yet, but lunch with a good friend, and surprising Reese at preschool for a little mommy-daughter time have certainly helped, as well as quiet nights at home with this:
The best thing I can do when I have the sads is to keep busy.
I went to the gym during the day. DURING THE DAY.
I spent an hour filling out and doodling in my new Erin Condren Life Planner
I made amazing dinners, including chicken baked in brown sugar and Italian seasoning with roasted parmesan zucchini and broccoli that was deee-lish.
I stuck hardcore to my Advocare 24 day Challenge. I can honestly attest to the fact that there is something special in that Spark drink. For real. I haven't had a fountain diet dr. pepper or coffee in almost 2 weeks. And it feels astonishingly good.
I'm reading alot, watching TV, searching for the perfect rug online...all little tasks designed to keep me distracted from those dang sads.
Everyone has them and they always pass but I just wanted to put it out there that I get them and I know lots of others do too.
What are your go-to ways to get rid of them?